Porn & Grilled Cheese & Bombs & Sniffing Glue
MISKEQUAN, WI -- Ok is it just me? Someone wake me up, or at least tell me that you think that the world has gone nuts too.
Did all this really happen in one week?
Bush got re-elected.
Bush got re-elected by millions of people who cited "moral values" as their prime motivating factor in voting for him.
The Pentagon is forcing kids to profess their belief in the almighty.
"Saving Private Ryan" couldnt be broadcast on Veterans' Day because of "profane language." (New version, "golly gee, that bulled dang near hit me!")
The senate is holding hearings with religious-agenda pseudo-scientists to "prove" that porn is addictive and thus (i guess) should be banned, just like tobacco, oh wait...no not like tobacco. Like umm, err...bad thoughts! BAD BAD. United States Commerce Department and Fucktard Committee. Scientists (so-called) are actually going to testify that looking at pictures is addictive and harmful. (vein..... popping...... out....... of......... forehead.............. must........ regain......... control........) Check out the biographies of those fucking NUTS they call "scientists." Do one better, Google them.
And the crowning jewel in bizzaro week -- (drum roll please) there is A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH WITH THE IMAGE OF THE VIRGIN MARY SELLING FOR $50,000 ON EBAY. You can’t make up shit this bizarre. Bid Now! . There are plenty of articles online about it, but I like the BBC version the best.
Seriously. If I come into work wearing no pants, a red cape, a jack-o-lantern on my head, with "I NEED A BREATH MINT" tattooed on my butt cheeks, jumping up and down screaming "WE ARE THE REAL PEOPLE AND WE SNIFF GLUE!" will anyone even notice? Or will I just fade into the background of loony-world?
Does my health insurance cover mental therapy? Because I think I'm THIS CLOSE to losing it.
Did all this really happen in one week?
Bush got re-elected.
Bush got re-elected by millions of people who cited "moral values" as their prime motivating factor in voting for him.
The Pentagon is forcing kids to profess their belief in the almighty.
"Saving Private Ryan" couldnt be broadcast on Veterans' Day because of "profane language." (New version, "golly gee, that bulled dang near hit me!")
The senate is holding hearings with religious-agenda pseudo-scientists to "prove" that porn is addictive and thus (i guess) should be banned, just like tobacco, oh wait...no not like tobacco. Like umm, err...bad thoughts! BAD BAD. United States Commerce Department and Fucktard Committee. Scientists (so-called) are actually going to testify that looking at pictures is addictive and harmful. (vein..... popping...... out....... of......... forehead.............. must........ regain......... control........) Check out the biographies of those fucking NUTS they call "scientists." Do one better, Google them.
And the crowning jewel in bizzaro week -- (drum roll please) there is A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH WITH THE IMAGE OF THE VIRGIN MARY SELLING FOR $50,000 ON EBAY. You can’t make up shit this bizarre. Bid Now! . There are plenty of articles online about it, but I like the BBC version the best.
Seriously. If I come into work wearing no pants, a red cape, a jack-o-lantern on my head, with "I NEED A BREATH MINT" tattooed on my butt cheeks, jumping up and down screaming "WE ARE THE REAL PEOPLE AND WE SNIFF GLUE!" will anyone even notice? Or will I just fade into the background of loony-world?
Does my health insurance cover mental therapy? Because I think I'm THIS CLOSE to losing it.
posted by Enrico Giamondi at 5:47 AM
1 Comments:
I found your blog through some ultra rude comments that you left on the blog of a friend of mine, and have to agree with her that you are, in fact, an asshole. HOWEVER, this post is absolutely hilarious.
*shrugs*
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